I mean, I’m the last person to judge a person’s parenting skills, but maybe your baby shouldn’t be teething on the dishwasher.
Unless I can take pictures.
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13 Comments
He is scruuuumptious.
That’s seriously maybe the only baby I’ve actually found cute.
That’s right–all of the rest of you whose babies I’ve complimented? LIES.
Don’t forget all the baby pictures of yourself. You think those are adorable.
What do you mean “think”?! Those are intrinsically cute.
That’s the latest homeopathic alternative to childhood inoculations. It works on the same principle as a vaccine without the risk of causing autism, ADHD, halitosis and whatever else Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey claim vaccines do to kids.
This made my day. But dishwashers should totally be clean on the inside by virtue of what they do, right? Unless they pump in dirty shower water, which seems likely in Ohio.
Would you kiss a prostitute after he brushed his teeth?
Seriously, you wouldn’t?
Facts: Babies are dumb. And gross. They don’t do anything right.
I will assume that you say this only because you’re jealous that your twelve illegitimate babies aren’t this cute.
But you know I agree.
My twelve illegitimate babies are EVERY bit as cute as that one! Except Cletus.
Really, is it any wonder babies and children are disease vectors? Chewing on a DISHWASHER? Eeewww.
Seriously, though. When I first started working at a kids science museum during college, I got sick about every other day. But by the end of the first year, I was like, “Come, children, wipe your snot on my lips.” IMMUNE SYSTEM OF STEEL.