Category Archives: creepy boyfriend obsession

Bellies Full of Cheeses, Faces Full of Spleen

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I’m leaving work early today to go to one of a long line of scholarship receptions for Dr. Boyfriend. Because even though the law firm where he’s a patent agent is paying for him to go to law school, he’s a genius and can’t avoid getting money thrown at him.

For some reason, I get all excited about these receptions. I just think it’s so neat that he works full-time and somehow still manages to be at the top of his class (mostly by staying home and reading cases when he should be taking his lady out dancing) that I feel sort of like a proud mother when the invitations come in the mail. I think about how the dean of the school will fawn over him, and how I’ll embarrass myself trying to make everyone laugh, and how we’ll fill up on cured meats and cookies.

But what I never remember is that by the end of them, this always happens:

Massive Glasses on a Tiny Face

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I was watching Dr. Boyfriend try on pants in the Banana Republic dressing room last week

and in my boredom, decided to try on his glasses:

So what do you think? When I get my new pair of glasses (say, this weekend), should I get the exact same pair?

WOULDN’T WE BE TOO ADORABLE FOR WORDS?!

Nerds in Love

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Kamran: I got salad, but I got too much.
1.5 lbs worth.
Defeats the healthy point a little.
me: Dang!
Kamran: I know, right?
me: Well, you’re a growing boy.
Kamran: Yea. I’m growing a strong gravitational field with all the mass I’m accumulating.
me: You keep pulling me into you.
Kamran: I got you in my orbit.
me: Along with a bunch of dust and metal.
Kamran: You’re my favorite orbital debris.

Your Fiery Red Color is MINE

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My Iranian (pronounced ih-RON-ee-an) boyfriend informs me that tonight is the Persian festival Chaharshanbe Suri! YES! My absolute favourite Persian holiday!!!

No, I didn’t know what it was, either, so Kamran sent me the Wikipedia link, and here’s the best part:

The tradition includes people going into the streets and alleys to make fires, and jump over them while singing the traditional song, Sorkhi-ye to az man; Zardi-ye man az to. The literal translation is, Your fiery red color is mine, and my sickly yellow paleness is yours.

This is a face that’s never seen yellow paleness, am I right?

Smile, and the Warmth Escapes from the Cracks Between Your Teeth

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I, I got you in my pocket
For when I get home
Keep you in my pocket
For when I get home
I keep you in my pocket
For when I get home
When I get home, when I get home

– Born Ruffians, “Badonkadonkey”