Adventure Time with Kat and Kam: Columbus, Ohio’s, German Village

Filed under adventure time, no i really do love ohio

The moment Kamran arrived in Ohio on Thursday night, two hours late thanks to the rain, my best friend, Tracey, and I whisked him off to Skully’s to dance until 2 a.m. And then we went home and ate ice cream cake until 3:30.

German Village, Columbus, OH
Tracey told me I’d hate my duckface in this picture, and she’s right

I was still getting over a cold, too, so when his alarm went off that morning at 8, I was seriously dreading having to get up and spend the day in downtown Columbus. But we had decided to have Tracey drop us off in German Village before work so we could revisit some of the places Kamran remembered from the years he lived in Columbus from 2nd to 4th grade. It turned out to be one of the most memorable moments of the trip.

We started at Katzinger’s Delicatessen, where we ate bagels just piled with cream cheese while sitting next to cases loaded with rugalach and barrels brimming with pickles. It’s fitting that I never once went to Katzinger’s while at THE Ohio State University and have never once been to Katz’s deli while in NYC. Someday I’ll learn.

As soon as The Book Loft opened, we walked a few blocks through the cobbled streets and fallen leaves to explore its 32 rooms of books. It’s a creaky old building divided off into themed rooms of every shape and size.

German Village, Columbus, OH

This was the smallest room we found. Kamran thinks its doorway was hidden by a huge map the last time he visited in 2000 on his way from California to Princeton for grad school.

German Village, Columbus, OH

He bought a book on the philosopher Heidegger for himself and a book on lobsters for me, which I realize makes me sound like a child, but it’s a totally serious book!

As we left, a guy from the Human Rights Campaign accosted us and forced me to donate money to the gayz, so we had to go to Starbucks to make ourselves feel like a part of the system again. And not to be a sellout or anything, but you guys, I got a salted caramel mocha thingy, and when I put my cup down on the table next to my extra-plush armchair, the sweet caramel began bubbling through the hole in the lid. COME ON. I can’t resist that.

German Village, Columbus, OH

Across the street was the Golden Hobby Shop, which is an old school filled with gifts handmade by senior citizens. Everything seemed underpriced to us, but that may just be six years of NYC shopping talking. We couldn’t figure out how to transport 400 buckeye necklaces and some really creepy-awesome folk art cats back in our suitcases, but I can imagine that this place would be excellent for local Christmas shopping.

On our way to lunch, we saw a green Yoda pumpkin

German Village, Columbus, OH

and a beheaded Brutus Buckeye

German Village, Columbus, OH

and stopped to take pictures of ourselves being badass for posterity:

German Village, Columbus, OH

German Village, Columbus, OH

German Village, Columbus, OH

We made it to Schmidt’s Sausage Haus and Restaurant (excuse me, Sausage Haus und Restaurant) around 1, somehow thinking there wouldn’t be a line on a Friday afternoon.

German Village, Columbus, OH

After a 25-minute walk around the neighborhood, our names were called over the loudspeaker outside, and we were seated at the most adorable old wooden booth for two. We briefly contemplated ordering plated entrees but then realized we’d be idiots not to get the $9.50 ($9.50!!!) buffet, which has four kinds of sausage, two kinds of potato salad, sausage stew, sauerkraut, and everything else German you could want.

German Village, Columbus, OH

We only made it through one plate apiece, but we had a good time doing it:

German Village, Columbus, OH

And of course we saved room for their famous big-as-your-head cream puffs, which we got with pumpkin filling and which they so graciously topped with an extra piece of my very favourite Halloween candy:

German Village, Columbus, OH

I can really only remember going to Schmidt’s once or twice while living in Ohio for twenty-four years, and I’m pretty sure I was a vegetarian at least one of those times, so I wasn’t all that excited when Kamran said he wanted to relive his childhood there. Well, it really struck me while I was there how different and better it is than all of the chain restaurants I want to visit every time I’m back home, and now I know I’m going to want to go back every time I’m in Ohio. I’m still dreaming about that sweet and spicy sausage stew . . .

German Village, Columbus, OH

After filling our bellies, we walked a few blocks to Schiller Park, where we watched dogs run free, climbed the very smallest hill just to run down it, got weirded out by how into things like bones and catnip dogs and cats are, and planned to buy every one of the Victorian houses lining the park’s edges.

German Village, Columbus, OH
Kamran’s only pretending to not be sure about this whole thing

German Village, Columbus, OH

And now you should understand why I love Ohio so much and stop making fun of me.


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19 Comments

  1. Tina says:

    Best post ever. I live like five blocks south of Skully’s on High, you need to come back.

    • katie ett says:

      DUDE. I’m really disappointed I didn’t get to have any embarrassing dancing pictures taken with you so I could make fun of myself instead of you on Facebook for once.

      I’m not sure why it’s never occurred to me that I could probably pretty easily force you to meet me.

      • Tina says:

        I was a Ladies 80’s regular before I started working for the university… then I bumped into a student at 1:30am while dancing to Tears for Fears and decided I needed to cool it. I guess this is growing up.

        Really though, if you ever find yourself with a free afternoon in Columbus, let me know.

  2. FOOD PICTURES!! I am most pleased.

    You and Kamran are cuter than baby otters, kittens and koala bears COMBINED.

    P.S. I think that Yoda pumpkin might actually be a cantaloupe.

  3. Jessica R. says:

    I went to Katz’s in Austin last year before the bad economy caused it to shut down, and it was yummy! Your photos are great and between the pumpkin festival, the beautiful scenery and German town, I now actually really want to visit Ohio.

  4. Loren says:

    My sister lives in Columbus right now (for grad school) I’ve visited her a couple times and LOVE the Book Loft. But I don’t think I’ve been to any of these other places. (She hates Columbus a little bit.)

  5. Serial says:

    Funny that you haven’t been to Katz’s as that’s one of the few iconic New York restaurants I’ve been to multiple times.

    And now I will dream of pastrami.

  6. Josh C says:

    I ran into Tracey at the pumpkin show, but never saw you or Kam.

    I was giving my girlfriend the introduction to columbus tour. Pumpkin Show, columbus zoo, brazenhead, barley’s, the big bang bar. Bob Evan’s for breakfast. Schmidt’s for lunch.

  7. Gena says:

    Salted caramel mochas are my life right now. I kind of hate myself for how much I’m at Starbucks, but I can’t lie about it.

    Also, HOLY SHIT PUMPKIN CREAM PUFFS. I need one of those in my body.

  8. Dishy says:

    I never thought Ohio would/could be a travel destination, but it SO IS!!! Katie, if you don’t send this to Columbus and the Ohio board of tourism, you’re doing all THREE of you a disservice.

    A+++

  9. bluzdude says:

    When I started reading, I was thinking, “I have to ask whether she’s heard of Schmidt’s Sausage Haus.” And then there it was. During our 5 years in Columbus, we frequented Schmidts numerous times. I always got the Bahama Mama, although if they had a buffet back then, I’d have been all over it. (I’m sure they waited for me to leave, before developing one.)

    Regarding the “badass” pictures: YOU look badass. Kamran looks like he’s waiting for his mom to come home and let him in.

    Glad you had a fun trip “home.”

  10. I mostly just love that you used adventure time for this, and that cream puff.

  11. Olivia says:

    So once again, you came to the Cbus and didn’t visit me a whole 15 minutes outside town in Canal. I mean, I think I was in Ireland when you were here and all, but still. Especially if you’re going to make comments on fish-eating ex’s that we all are better off forgetting about…I think you still owe me. Owe me one pumpkin-cream-filled cream-puff-as-big-as-my-head.

  12. stela says:

    Great pictures!! I want to go to Ohio now. True story.

  13. ah i wish i knew about all of this when i was in columbus a few years ago visiting my cousin. she went out there for school and never came back haha

  14. Lisa says:

    There is a distinct lack of German anything in Shreveport, and now I’m really sad about that.

  15. tasha says:

    The lions and tigers and bears didn’t make it into the “adventure time” post? Wtf.

  16. Tracey says:

    I hate I have a job, and that you two were allowed to have experiences without me while you were here.

    I’m going to be equally jealous when you post about your afternoon at Aunt Dorothy’s.

  17. Frenchie says:

    So, two things:
    1 – Serial’s cream puffs kick all others’ asses.
    2 – You will never live down Ohio, no matter how gracious and badass and whatever else you may be.