Attacked by the Bubble Man

Filed under living in new york sucks so hard

There are these gypsy vendors near the Bowling Green subway station every night who sell ties for $5, earrings for $2, perfume for $10, candy for $1, and so on. Most of them are harmless, and indeed, I almost enjoy hearing the guy with the huge dreadlocks boom, “Everything a dollar!” and seeing the candy lady sitting at her cart and reading in between customers every day. I like to think about how many books she finishes in a week.

But every now and then, there’s a guy selling bubble guns. He’s really aggressive with people he has no chance of selling to, like young women in impressive suits and bachelors with popped collars. He repeats, “Get your bubbles; take a LOOK!” and shoots bubbles at the people who ignore him.

Last night, he was directing his bubbles right into the face of a little Japanese kid in a stroller while the parents just smiled, and I passed by without looking at him. He said, “Get your bubbles; take a LOOK!” right into my ear, and I ignored him, so he stalked after me and shot bubbles at me halfway down the stairs to the subway.

Can I file harassment charges?

9 Comments

  1. Cristy says:

    I usually love bubbles, but that’s a bit ridiculous.

    I have been known to blow bubbles over people’s cubes at work to try to cheer them up (it worked sometimes). I’m a little weird. :)

  2. bluzdude says:

    Maybe he’s possessed by the ghost of Lawrence Welk…

  3. Re. Bubble Gun Man: It’s too bad you can’t shove bubbles up somebody’s ass.

    Re. your nefarious plan for the rat fink in your office: I like it! Very Joker-esque. I say go for it.

  4. Alfagirl says:

    Lawrence Welk comment hilarious. Katie, they parody that show on SNL sometimes and there’s always a lot of bubbles floating around…

  5. Tracey says:

    In all of my years of reading feminist accounts of street harassment on blogs, none of them has EVER involved bubbles. Congratulations on your ability to surprise me.

    Although, I did already know that bubbles are creepy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dr9cE0lLrFg