Monthly Archives: February 2010

Jesus, Please Hear My Prayers for an Amazon Kindle, and Please Ignore the Fact that I Call Myself “Very Not” Religious in My Facebook Profile

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I really need an Amazon Kindle. I’m not messing around anymore.

I took this book, Not That Kind of Girl by Carlene Bauer, out of the library that was supposed to be a really well-written girl-who-wants-to-love-Jesus-but-also-likes-rock-music-moves-to-NYC story, and I was prepared to love it, because I used to be very torn between Jesus and rock music, and I moved to NYC, but I didn’t find the book particularly well-written after having read Nicole Krauss’ The History of Love, and I didn’t find it particularly interesting. Plus, it was a bulky hardcover, and I don’t carry a bag big enough to for it to fit in, so I kept leaving it at home, and it was going so slowly I thought I might finish my own novel before I finished it.

It finally came due, and I was going to renew it just to slog through some more, but someone else had reserved it. So I decided to give up on it rather than deal with the overdue charges, but as I was riding the subway to return it to the library, I got to a really juicy part about this boy who liked her and whom she liked and how close they got without ever touching one another, but then I was at my station, and I felt like I needed to return the book since I had ridden two whole stops, so I did, and now I’ll never know what happened with that boy.

If I had an Amazon Kindle, this would never happen. I’d be able to read whenever I wanted to, because the smaller Kindle can fit in any bag. My books would never have a due date, so I could spend as much time as I wanted daydreaming about the boys I never touched and not worry about how slowly I was reading. And I’d be saving the trees by not reading physical books. Is that a legitimate reason for having an e-book reader? I have no idea. Anyway, I would.

OH! OH! And if I read more books, maybe I’d have more than eight friends on Shelfari. You can understand how embarrassing that is.

I have an English degree, people! I should be reading more than one book per year.

My First Greyhound Trip is Only Going to Make Me 100 Times More Annoyed at the Airport Next Time

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I considered taking a Greyhound bus trip a few years back, but a friend warned me, “You wouldn’t like it.” I didn’t ask questions–just drove myself fourteen hours by car–but I remained curious about what it might be like to travel by bus. Naturally, I jumped at the chance when Greyhound offered me an exclusive ride last weekend on their new Lucky Streak line that travels from New York’s Port Authority directly to your choice of eight casinos. The trip also included a round-trip bus ticket for my guest, lovely accommodations overlooking the boardwalk and beach at the Hilton Casino Resort, a wine reception at the top of the Tropicana Casino & Resort, complimentary spa treatments at Bally’s, shopping certificates for any of the Tropicana’s upscale shops and restaurants, and free slot play vouchers for the Hilton and the Tropicana.

Greyhound’s biggest competitor is the automobile, but anyone driving a car to Atlantic City has no idea what they’re missing out on. Forget navigating, pumping gas, and parking; the biggest draw of public transportation for me is not having to pay any attention to where I’m going, so I loved being able to board the bus in NYC and spend the next two hours doing whatever I wanted, even if what I wanted was to nap. With service right to the casinos, you don’t even need to worry about grabbing a cab once you arrive in Atlantic City.

I don’t own a car, but I’m a frequent airplane passenger and find myself more annoyed with airlines every time I fly. Even before we left Port Authority, I noticed several reasons why I might choose Greyhound over an airline:

+ I didn’t have to arrive at my departure gate hours early just to sit around. There’s no ridiculous security line where you have to remove your shoes, put your laptop in a separate container, and empty your pockets of the dime you didn’t even know was in there. I walked in, walked right up to my gate, and boarded the bus.

+ Once on the bus, I was free to use electronic devices at my leisure. No one told me to turn off my cellphone for takeoff one minute only to inform me that we were actually going to be waiting on the runway for another hour the next.

+ Because there’s no single runway as with planes, buses can leave when they’re supposed to without regard to the schedules of other buses.

+ My luggage was with me through the entire trip. Carry-ons fit beneath the seat and overhead, while bigger bags are stored underneath the coach, so there’s no chance of my suitcase disappearing behind a check-in counter and ending up in Los Angeles when I’m in Boston.

The new fleet of Greyhound buses features free wi-fi and an electrical outlet at the base of the seat in front of you, so it’s easy for the entire trip to slip away as you tweet about how much you’re enjoying the supple leather seats and the smooth ride. The CEO and COO of Greyhound–David Leach and Bill Blankenship, respectively–rode the bus to Atlantic City with us in order to speak with each blogger personally, and I was impressed with their knowledge and passion, especially when it came to the reduced-emission design of their new buses. Truly, now more than ever, taking Greyhound instead of a plane or a car is a great way to lessen your carbon footprint.

The negative aspects to taking a bus are the ones you’ve no doubt heard a million times: it’s slower than other forms of transportation, and the lack of security inspections–while a real pleasure with a group of like-minded bloggers–could be worrisome otherwise.

Fortunately, now’s the perfect time for you to decide for yourself by taking advantage of Greyhound’s Lucky Streak $1 promotion. For a dollar, you can ride round trip between NYC and Atlantic City, and all Lucky Streak schedules have open returns, which means you can stay until your money runs out. Each of the eight casinos Greyhound services are offering a bonus to all Lucky Streak riders, so you’ll be awarded between $25 and $30 to play at the slots. I’m already planning my return.

In Which Kamran Fakes His Death on a Bus

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Kamran’s simulated crash face does not in any way reflect how our trip to Atlantic City on Greyhound’s Lucky Streak Bus went:

However, this is a fairly accurate portrayal of his feelings toward wearing a seatbelt on public transportation:

A full report is forthcoming.