I saw this on Pinterest last night:
I hate unattributable inspirational quotes in general, but I love this one specifically.
I’ve been arguing with so many people lately (Jack) about how I have to be faking how well I’m dealing with Kamran’s physical absence from my life, but maybe I’m just gracefully letting go of something that wasn’t meant for me.
And if we’re being honest, the level at which I’m dealing with things varies from day to day. Sometimes, this life I’ve been living for the past almost-three months seems so normal to me it’s hard to remember that there was a time before I lived in my own apartment 100% of the time, before I did everything with Jack and Nik and Ash and Kim, before I had to wonder if I’ll ever find such a match again. But sometimes, I think about how I spent more than SIX YEARS knowing who My Person was, and now I don’t know anymore.
I mean, I guess My Uninterrupted Person is Tracey, my BFF since 7th grade. But we live states apart. And there was this moment on our Puerto Rico vacation last month when she wasn’t there and I thought everyone wanted to go horseback riding but me, and I just felt so alone for a moment, remembering that two months prior, I belonged to someone, and he belonged to me, and if I told him I felt weird about work animals, he would understand and would go to the pool with me instead, and he wouldn’t even mind missing out on the horseback riding because nothing felt better to him than supporting his Person.
I’ve loved so much, though, and have been so lucky in who’s loved me. How can I not gracefully accept my current circumstances when I’m so grateful for my past ones?