The Best NYC Tour Guide EVER

Filed under all of my friends are prettier than i am, living in new york is neat, no i really do love ohio

I got sick again! I’m guessing this is to spite me for all the “I’m a farmgirl; my germ defenses are country strong” bragging I do and all of the “let your kids play in the dirt so they won’t end up with pansyass immune systems like yours” advice I give.

The worst part is that it just so happened to be during the four days my cousin Will came in from Ohio with a couple of his ladyfriends for his first time touring the city as an adult. So the things I did with them included:

• dinner in my neighborhood at Lobo, followed by dessert at VanLeeuwen, neither of which I could taste

• dinner at “Top Chef” contestant Angelo Sosa’s Social Eatz with Kamran, my roommate, Jack, and our friend Nik, where I could taste even less

• five minutes on our rooftop deck before we all chickened out from the heat

Aaaaaaand . . . that’s it. On the bright side, Will and his friends totally learned how to use the subway on their own! And anyway, they probably didn’t want me along on their big city adventures, trying to convince them not to spend $300 on shoes. Although I probably could’ve prevented that pesky two-hour separation that occurred when Will decided to hop onto a train without his friends just as the doors were closing.

But where’s the fun in that.

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18 Comments

  1. Cassie says:

    Personally, I think you gave Will a good lesson in life: Women can’t be trusted.

    I mean, um, Women are a great way to practice patience.

    Yah. That’s right.

    • With hotels running $300 a night here, he’d BETTER be willing to show me a little patience! Although I did force the two girls to sleep on a twin-size air mattress; I sort of thought it was a queen when I told them the three of them could stay with me. Oops.

  2. Serial says:

    I had an old friend visit me in Aynor this week. I cooked for her, then grudgingly sat outside with her while she smoked a cigarette, the whole time complaining about the mosquitoes.

    BUT we saw fireflies.

    Then I cooked for her again and sent her on her merry way.

    So really, Will should count his blessings.

    • I saw your Facebook update about fireflies, and I totally had the same reaction when I was home earlier in the month and saw them for the first time this year. That is the only bug I don’t actively seek out to kill in the country.

  3. Tracey says:

    Getting separated from my party by the closing doors is one of my biggest subway fears! I don’t want to hear that it actually happens to people. I also don’t want to think about how such situations were ever handled before cell phones.

    • Seriously! I can imagine it happening when you’re traveling with a group, but I just assumed it was obvious that the person left behind would immediately go to the surface, and the person in the train would get off at the next stop, and the two would call each other ASAP. But apparently Will ended up somewhere uptown, and Lauren ended up in a Brooklyn ghetto. So maybe my plan isn’t so obvious.

  4. Jessica says:

    One day Kel and I are going to visit NYC and I fully expect you to give us the great restaurant tour of the city.

    • Hope you’re ready to raid Sarah’s college fund! I feel bad taking the kids to my $30-a-plate favourites, but I’d force you two to do the ladies-who-lunch thing with me at Craft and Tocqueville and Jean-Georges and the whole bit. And then we’d eat bon-bons on the Staten Island Ferry.

  5. Wait a minute…
    was that bottom photo taken from your rooftop deck?! I’d compliment you on that view, but my eyes have started twitching jealously and things are starting to look a bit blurry…
    :)

    • It was! It’s my first time ever having rooftop access in NYC! I’ve had plenty of fire escapes, and sitting on one of those and sipping some tea always seemed so romantic to me. Except that I’m pretty sure I would’ve died had I ever stepped foot on any one of mine. But that’s basically NYC in a nutshell.

  6. Lisa says:

    Heat? I just checked your 10 day forecast, and I’m moving, like, yesterday.

    • Oh, gosh, I know, right? You guys have it pretty rough, weather-wise. But we don’t have cars! And our ocean never gets truly warm during the summer! That has to count for something!

  7. Dishy says:

    LOVE. Not the part about you being sick, just hearing about Will & the ladies adventures. NYC is a fun town to visit. PS: get well soon chica!

    • I guess I was about their age the first time I visited, but I had tour guides for miles, and I’m not sure we ever even rode the subway at all, and here they were, learning it all by themselves. I didn’t even ride the subway alone for the first month I lived here!

  8. Abigal says:

    Another great way to tour the city is through a great website that just launched called City Maps . It really helped me find anything from restaurants and reviews to shopping and salons…its a one stop shop for everything. You can even make you dinner reservations on it! Its a great tool for people in need of some guidence around NYC!

    • You know, at first I was offended that you would try to casually spam my blog and pass it off like you were offering a real piece of advice, but then I looked at the site you’re spamming for, and I actually like it, so in a great act of kindness, I approved your comment. You’re welcome!

      I still recommend that you change your tactic for other blogs, though. And also get someone to edit the punctuation in your comment. If your company needs someone to edit for them, I have superior skillz that come pretty cheap.

  9. You seriously have, like, the best-looking extended family ever.

  10. Cristy says:

    Fireflies! :) Our dog was chasing one in the yard a minute ago. Awesome.

    Love your rooftop view. Wow.