Disneyland: Part 1

Filed under all of my friends are prettier than i am, creepy boyfriend obsession, travels

It has been brought to my attention that I’m never being taken back to Disneyland again if I don’t post the photos from our trip while in California, so here you are, three months later.

We invited Kamran’s friends Gary and Diana along,


thinking that they might enjoy a trip to The Happiest Place on Earth™ without their two kids in tow. Little did we know that Gary and Diana are Disneyland experts and basically made our visit 100 times better than it would’ve been had we gone alone.

After following these fine folks all the way through Anaheim,


the first thing Gary made me do upon our arrival at the park


was stop by City Hall to tell them it was my birthday and get a special button that entitled me to an entire day of Disney employees being forced to joyfully wish me a happy birthday. Even the guys picking up trash were smiling and calling me by name. It really appealed to the famewhore part of me.


Then Gary ran around like a madman, picking up as many FASTPASS tickets as possible while the rest of us stood in line for the less-popular rides like the Jungle Cruise and The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh,


which was trippy as hell.

Pooh looks totally evil here, right?

It meant we were able to bypass the horrendous lines on rides like the Indiana Jones Adventure and Splash Mountain


and make little kids cry as they saw us jog past them and their weak little standing-in-line-for-more-than-an-hour legs. Kamran got a real kick out that, obviously.


No, really.


We saw the Sleeping Beauty Castle


and figured out that compared to Disney World’s Cinderella Castle, only the Seven Dwarfs could sleep here:

Although staying there is by invitation only, apparently, so even they probably couldn’t.
Stinky dwarf feet and all.

We went on Pirates of the Caribbean twice,


mostly to see this guy suggestively humping his canon:

Right? I’m not just imagining how dirty that is.

After seeing churros cart after churros cart,


we finally bought one, because I swear those things don’t exist at Disney World.

Also suggestive.


Along with cotton candy.


And a funnel cake.


Which gave Kamran the energy to conquer the feats of strength in Toontown. Which are of course meant for children.


Not that Kamran can in any way be considered adult.



  1. jenny gordon says:

    If your blog had a ‘like’ button as Facebook does, I would press it for the pictures. I love it for your accompanying explanations. Quite excellent.

  2. Cristy says:

    Awesome! I’ve been to Disneyland in CA and have heard that there’s just no comparison. I’d love to go to DW someday. Great pics. :)

  3. bluzdude says:

    Passing up all the kiddies in line would make my day. I had to stand in the freakin lines all day as a kid (at Cedar Point) so why should they be any different. Builds character!

  4. Jessica R. says:

    Isn’t the birthday button amazing?

    Also, for some reason I can’t stop laughing at that photo of Kamran with the “Hunny” pot. He looks like he’s about to grab it off that shelf and dig in. And that lady behind him in the TNT photo looks very unhappy about being stuck at Disney Land.

  5. spaghedeity says:

    oh yeah, i noticed how the picture-then-description order you had going on suddenly reversed without explanation after we finally bought one, because I swear those things don’t exist at Disney World.

    but i have to agree, disneyland is pretty great. it’s a bit of an understatement, though, calling it the happiest place on earth. it’s more like the happiest island on earth; an island of happiness surrounded by a sea of dirty, dangerous LA.

  6. shawn says:

    I love the Churros and the HUGE corndogs there! my favorite land is Fantasyland because the castle is so bitesize. You have to go again during winter because they decorate it so well.

  7. That last photo of Kamran is Number One.