Dumpy Butt

Filed under good times at everyone else's expense, living in new york sucks so hard, stuff i like

I don’t mean to jab at anyone’s sense of style, because I live in granny sweaters, but I spent a lot of my time in NYC thinking, “It is so sad that she spent so much time and effort to look like that.”

Most interesting designs, I think, look wonderful in theory and terrible in practice.

But even I surprise myself sometimes with the things I like these days. Like t-straps and saddle shoes, which my mom used to force me into against my will when I was kid.

Even lately, I’ve found myself not totally hating the idea of things like harem pants, which appeared in jumpsuit form in this season of “Project Runway”, looked pretty amazing, and won a challenge to end up on a Time Square billboard:

photo by Modelinia

But last night, on my way to the subway, I walked behind this girl, who proved my “terrible in practice” theory:

But I applaud her for trying.


  1. karinya says:


    That is all.

  2. Serial says:

    No. No. And no.

  3. MHW says:

    Not a good choice for the young lady, no.

    Are you sure uploading a video of her arse to YouTube was the best way of letting her know?

    • Haha, I did think about that. I first uploaded it directly to my site but then realized I have no idea how to embed video. I’ll have to figure that out before I want to make fun of someone again.

      Hopefully she doesn’t recognize herself! All of my videos get approximately 10 views, so it shouldn’t be a problem.

  4. Alfagirl says:

    Pants are tricky to make because it’s all about cut. The harem pants on the billboard were great because they were just baggy enough to make the model look like she had normal width legs, and they were tighter in the butt (from what I remember when I saw the episode). Making excellent fitting pants are hard to pull off, especially when you tweak a normal silhouette.
    If you’re going to do the harem pant trend you can’t go for a style that’s too baggy otherwise you end up looking like an upside triangle — the same problem you get with badly pleated pants. It’s not hammer time.

  5. Kim says:

    I love SO MUCH that you filmed this stranger looking such a mess. Coldhearted, you. As it should be.

    I hate harem pants. My personal style is definitely not everyone’s (yeah, bracelets made of ropes) but I do like keeping up with fashion in that I like to at least know what’s going on and where it came from. But sometimes, NYC pressures or not, I JUST CAN’T appreciate any part of a style, be it influence or vision or execution or styling or whatever. Harem pants are one. They don’t look good on anyone. Even the people who wear them “best” (which are of course the tiniest girls) still just look like they’re wearing poorly tailored 80s leftovers.

    Also, what the hell are her shoes.

    Also, for a second I thought that she was carrying the Botkier Venice feed bag, because of that hot pink, but I guess that’s just a tote. Too bad.

    • I didn’t feel that bad for her, because she had no idea it was being done, but I did feel weird that other people were watching me film her. Mostly because I assumed they assumed I was a perv who’s into adult babies.

      For me, it’s all about context. I think even the CRAZIEST things look good on the runway sometimes just because the runway should be over-the-top. I love pictures of people in bright, wild make-up, too. But when you see these things in real life, especially in the financial district, they’re almost always horrific.

      I have a hot pink tote bag, too. Shaky camera or no, you’d know it’s from Target.

  6. Sandy says:

    She looks like she IS wearing a diaper, it is full, and also partially wedged in her ass crack, and she’s trying to “discreetly” dislodge it.

  7. Tracey says:

    I’m sort of scared now that you’ve secretly filmed me and all of my fashion disasters.

    Thank GOD YouTube wasn’t around when we were in the 5th grade.

  8. Of course, it doesn’t help that both of them are WADDLING.

    I’m trying reeeeeaaaaally hard not to get started on my rant about how people need to learn to stand up straight and walk like adult human beings.

    • Gah! At first, I thought he was commenting on how awful it is to be seen on the street like that, but NO.

      And of course all of the commenters are all up his butt. Although I guess you guys are all up MY butt for agreeing with me, so thanks.