The Best Thing About “Eclipse” (and the Most Annoying)

Filed under good times at everyone else's expense, i used to be so cool, my uber-confrontational personality, readin' and writin', there's a difference between films and movies, why i'm better than everyone else

I was surprised to learn, upon reading them, that though the writing is as awful as I would’ve imagined, the plot of the Twilight series is actually pretty clever. Unlike, say, “Lost”, all of the loose ends eventually tie up, and the things you never thought would matter suddenly do. There are no red herrings nor MacGuffins in them.

Yet they still totally annoy me simply because their author, Stephenie Meyer, has to thank the band Muse in each of them. In all of the novels’ afterwords, right alongside appreciation of her editor and agent, she’ll say things like, “And thanks also to my favourite band, the very aptly named Muse, for providing a saga’s worth of inspiration.” And then I will claw her eyes out.

It’s not even that I don’t like Muse. I actually really liked them in NINETEEN-NINETY-NINE when I was listening to them. But I just can’t handle some kids’-book-writin’, middle-aged Mormon thinking she’s all cool for liking one pop-alt band. It’s like moviestars thinking anyone cares about their political activism. And you know she’s just doing it in some used-to-be-unpopular girl’s attempt to befriend the band she loves.

I went to see Eclipse last night with my friend Ash, though, and aside from a couple of actually-hilarious moments, what I was surprised by most was the soundtrack. It does not suck. In fact, it includes The Bravery, the amazing Ohio band The Black Keys, and my favourite band right now, Band of Horses. And the music is used really well. The first time you see, Jacob, for instance, the camera moves in on his face as a grinding bluesy song starts, and it’s this total moment. How annoying is that?

I can console myself with the fact that I know it wasn’t Stephenie Meyer choosing the music and how it’s used, but I can still continue to hate her for all of her Muse-suck-upping. Mostly because I know I’d do exactly the same thing if I was in her shoes.

Except with a better band.

Comments Closed

14 Comments

  1. Noel says:

    Oh my gosh I love you even more. You’ve hit on one of my pet peeves. First of all, the “Eclipse” soundtrack is amazing (as is “New Moon”‘s too, actually. “Twilight”‘s sucked majorly), and I have not stopped listening to it for weeks now. I haven’t seen “Eclipse” yet, but I can’t wait to see how all this great music fits in.

    But the whole Stephenie Meyer thanking bands thing really annoys me. I had never heard of Muse until reading her gushing “thank yous” at the end of Twilight, so I downloaded some albums and gave them a listen. They’re ok, but nothing special. What really yanked my chain is that she likes Brand New, my all-time favorite band. A middle-aged Mormon housewife does NOT like the same band as me. Sorry, lady. Give it up.

    I also find it amusing how now Muse is EVERYWHERE. They are like *the* band for soundtracks and background music. Do they like being Twilight sell-outs? Obviously yes. You don’t see Brand New whoring themselves around for Stephenie Meyer, and that is why I love them.

    • Kim says:

      Is this comment meant to be ironic? I forgot the one I was going to leave because I read it so many times and got confused.

    • Seriously, once you get on “Saturday Night Live”, you are famous and no longer have to sell your songs to Tom Cruise movies.

      Wouldn’t it be great if Stephenie secretly hates that she single-handedly made Muse famous? I’d feel much better knowing that she hates all of her fans and wishes they’d grow a pair and start liking their own bands.

  2. caropal says:

    I have no real opinion on the Twilight books or films, as I have neither read nor seen them (though the whole “romance via stalking” thing creeps me out to no end), so I will just tell you this:

    For my birthday last year, David surprised me with tickets to see Band of Horses at the House of Blues. We were insanely close and they were as amazing as you’d expect. For his birthday this past Wednesday, I got him their new album. (Other things, too, but that’s clearly the important part.)

    So? Do you love us more now? Pleeeeeeeease?

    • It’s not stalking! It’s just standing in her bedroom all night and watching her sleep! THAT’S WHAT LOVE IS, BETH, and the fact that David evidently doesn’t do it for you means I can’t love you two.

      Okay, I kind of love you. Incidentally, I kind of hate you, but that should change once Kamran finally graduates law school and doesn’t keep me to the current one concert per year rule.

  3. Noel says:

    Katie! I’ve now seen the movie and I am disappointed that in this post you failed to mention that when the Muse song comes on during the graduation party scene, Bella’s nitwit friends say something like, “OMG this is my favorite song!” I literally laughed out loud in the theater.

    • I think I must have missed that part, because in my head I kept repeating, “Who cares? Who cares? Where’s Jacob? Where’s Jacob?”

      I’m sad to know that either Stephenie had some influence on the movie or the director cared about making her happy. Gross.

  4. If I ever write a Catholic morality tale that winds up as a movie with its very own soundtrack, I’m going to thank Katie Ett in my afterwords.

    Suck on THAT, Stephenie Meyer, and your $750k advance!!

    (No, I’m not bitter. Nope. Not at all.)

    • It’s funny that even the most popular author ever is making less than any reality game show contestant. In this case and only this case, it makes me happy.

      By then, my band with Kamran will be in full swing, and you’ll ask us to do the soundtrack, and we’ll do all-indie versions of Beach Boys songs. So make sure Beach Boys songs make sense with your story. Thx.

      • Cristy says:

        I LOVE the idea of indie versions of Beach Boys songs. Can’t wait to see a movie that has BG writing something that will fit that soundtrack. ;)

  5. Julie says:

    I totally hate their song, Uprising, just because it seems like everyone only loves it because of Twilight. But, then they keep playing it on the radio and I keep hearing it, and then I actually like the song. Then I get all confused. And that pisses me off.

    I’m right there with you on this one!

    • I know just what you mean. I keep hearing it in the trailer to that Tom Cruise/Cameron Diaz movie, and it fits in so perfectly with an action movie that it starts to make me think I like the song and the movie. And while my parents said the movie is actually good, they also go to see things like “Are We There Yet?”, so they cannot be trusted.

      I’m notoriously bad for being sucked in by good songs in movie trailers, though. See The Watchmen and Garden State.


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