Keep it together, New York City. My dad already thinks I’m stupid enough for living here.

Filed under living in new york sucks so hard

Saturday: a bomb scare closes down Times Square.

Sunday: someone kills himself by jumping from Kamran’s apartment building.



  1. bluzdude says:

    Jumper probably bet heavily on Icebox in the Derby.

  2. Kim says:

    What ever happened to good old fashioned suicide-by-Rx? God people are such narcissists (in the bad way).

    I’m such a bitch. But still. Enough with the leaping to your death, drama kings and queens. You might hurt someone else.

    • Dude, there’s no WAY I’m going to kill myself alone in my apartment. I do like the idea of the neighbors smelling me after a few days, but even then, it’s basically only the police who find me.

      But a jump off a 21-story building right beside FDR? That’s major. There’s also a rumor that he either jumped onto a car or got hit by one. +1000 points

      I of course will be drowning myself in the Central Park Lake during duck-feeding season so all the kiddies can spot me and be ruined for life.

  3. thickcrust says:

    You’re saving the pictures for a later post… RIGHT??!!!

    • You know I wanted to take one, but it was too dark outside to see anything from the laundry room windows. It’s pretty awesome to think that Kamran and I were switching our clothes from the washer to the dryer while this dude was staring out of his window at the East River and preparing to jump. I hope he was listening to Q Lazzarus’s “Goodbye Horses” as he did it.

  4. I mean, the (potential) bombing’s really bad and all – THOUSANDS of people could’ve been injured or killed – but dude, it would CREEP MY SHIT OUT if somebody jumped off the roof of the building where I SLEEP.

    Although frankly, I’m also kind of with Kim here – take an overdose of sedatives and call it a day. Don’t make a big splattery spectacle of yourself.

  5. Mike Lowrey says:

    You think that’s rough???
    I was in Red Hook, Brooklyn one day chilling when a guy busts out a Tech 9 machine gun with a banana clip and sprayed up a bunch of cars trying to kill rival drug dealers.

    Now that’s something to write home about. When you hear bullets coming 6 at a time towards you!

    The next day I forgot all about it was kicking it again in the same spot.

    He only killed himself. No Points. If he would have taken out some tourists with him or “the man” then +1000 points.